Heartfelt Living

How to Move Out of Resistance and Feel Good Now

Do you hold yourself back from your hopes and dreams? Have you ever allowed fear and doubt to prevent your dreams from becoming a reality? How often do you allow your worries to pollute your daily experience of life?

When we allow fear, worry, or doubt to take the lead, it’s challenging to feel good while navigating life. When we hold ourselves back from feeling good in life, we move into a place of resistance. Our resistance often draws in more fear, worry and doubt.

If we continue focusing on what we don’t want, the momentum builds and we become more resistant. Our resistance holds us back from feeling good and enjoying the experiences we truly want in life. It’s a vicious cycle. But it’s one we can break with a little care and practice.

Breaking the cycle of resistance requires that we rise to the occasion of our lives. It requires that we care more about how we feel than anything else. We can use our feelings as a guide to get on the path of least resistance.

When we are less resistant, we are more open to focus on what we do want. Directing our attention to what we do want, helps us move with our lives, instead of pushing against our lives.

When we are in resistance this all can sound like a huge leap of faith. In a way it is. The real question to ask yourself is: how do I want to feel right now?

Chances are, you don’t want to feel worse, you want to feel better. Each of us is in charge of how we choose to feel in life. If you know you want to feel good, then practice getting more comfortable feeling good.

Here are the practices I’m using to move out of resistance and feel good in my daily life. Give them a try and see what opens up for you.

Practice #1: Fear is a Gift

Changing how we view fear is a gift we can give ourselves. Fear is an emotion that’s hard to hide. The more we feed it, the greater it grows. Fear is an intense feeling that evokes a physical response. The fact that we can feel fear on a physical level is the hidden blessing. The intensity of the feeling can be used as a wake-up call to tune inward, regroup and change the momentum of our thinking. Fear can be seen as a sign that we’ve separated from our inner truth and it’s time to realign.

It’s not always helpful to feel the fear and do it anyway. The real work is to get in tune with our inner truth and guidance system. When we are aligned, we trust in our steps forward despite not knowing what will happen next. When we move with the ebb and flow of our life, we move out of resistance and fear.

Think of resistance as a giant rock at the head of a river. If we are scared of the current in the river, imagine how it would feel to have to swim upstream toward the rock. By the time we reached the rock, we’d feel exhausted and even more petrified because we pushed so hard against the force of the river. We’d cling to the rock because we’re afraid to do anything else. Then we’d have to witness all the other people having fun in the river. We’d watch them enjoy their ride as they float downstream with the current. Life is like this too. We simply need to trust in ourselves, find our point of least resistance and start there.

Added Daily Practice:

Next time you feel fear, ask yourself: what do I want right now? How do I want to feel in this situation? What is one small step I can make in this moment that will help me move closer to what I truly want?

Practice #2: When in Doubt, Switch Gears

When we are overcome with doubt, it can be challenging to know what we truly want. When we are overwhelmed, it’s helpful to take a break from what feels heavy and hard by switching gears.

The idea is to choose a distraction that is healthy. When we divert our attention away from what feels hard, we stop the momentum of resistant and doubt-filled thoughts.

Taking a break from doubt can create the opening for clarity and connection to our inner truth. It feels good to feel good. When in doubt do something that feels good.

Added Daily Practice:

Instead of lamenting over doubt, put your doubt aside and divert your attention to a healthy pastime.

Take a nap, read a book, get outside, listen to music, dance, play with your kid or pet, or do something creative. If you meet up with a friend, don’t spend the whole time venting and fixating on your doubt. Just do something that’s healthy and will help you change the overall vibe of your thinking and mindset.

Practice #3: Use Feelings to Guide Acceptance and Alignment

In order to live life aligned with our truth, it’s important to be aware of our feelings. Our feelings are powerful. When we become aware of what we are feeling on a regular basis, it’s easier to course-correct and get on the path of least resistance.

When we are in alignment with our inner truth, we feel good. But what about the rest of the time? The moments when we feel upset, stuck in resistance, frustrated, or angry. We can use these feelings as our guide too. All of our feelings become a gift when we see them as a sign that it’s time to re-align with our inner guide.

When we are in alignment, our inner wisdom will lead us toward more ease and grace. This isn’t to say we won’t continue to feel sad, mad or scared. We are human beings, so we get to experience the whole spectrum of feelings. But our acceptance helps us experience challenging feelings in a different light. Our feelings will not go away, but our willingness to move through, helps soften the intensity.

We are always evolving and our experience is constantly changing. When we use our feelings as a guide, we create more self-awareness. When we care about how we feel, we start to notice that we have a say in how our experience of life will play out. With acceptance and alignment, it becomes easier to see that the path of least resistance is always available to us.

Added Daily Practice:

Start your morning and set an intention to feel good immediately. Bring your awareness to 3 things you are grateful for in the moment. Allow yourself to feel grateful. The more you lean in and feel gratitude, the more momentum will carry over into your day. When you feel yourself in resistance, use the above practices. Either focus on what you do want, or switch gears and do something you know will feel good. When we practice accepting our different feelings as they come up, we strengthen our presence. When we are present and not caught up in resistance, it’s easier to feel good.

What about you, what is your access point on the path of least resistance?

Emily

Like what you read? Sign Up for free weekly inspiration with Emily’s featured articles, happiness strategies and videos and you’ll receive my free E-Course ‘Self-Care Success: Adopting a Self-Care Mindset That Sticks’.

Would you like to feel aligned in a life you love? Come check out my Fall in Love With Your Life, One Week at a Time’ book on kindle and in softcover and hardcover, or explore the different E-Course offerings on my Love Your Life School. It’s a space to create new habits of thinking that will help you fall in love with your life.

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Emily Madill

Emily Madill is an author and certified professional coach (ACC), with a BA in Business and Psychology. She is one of Thrive Global’s editors-at-large and a coach at BetterUp. Emily has published 12 titles in the area of self-development and empowerment, both for children and adults. You can find her writing in Chicken Soup for the Soul:Think Positive for Kids; The Huffington Post; Thrive Global; TUT.com; Best Self Magazine; The Muse; MindBodyGreen; Emerging Women; TinyBuddha; Aspire Magazine; and others. Emily has a private coaching practice and an online program, offering courses that support women to create lasting habits around self-love, self-awareness and all things related to time and weekly planning. She lives on Vancouver Island, Canada, with her husband, two sons and their sweet rescue dog Annie. Learn more at: emilymadill.com

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